Tuesday, March 31, 2015

March

It's the end of the month, and I haven't written a single post.
It's probably because I'm either ignoring life, or getting beat down a bit by it.
Not like anything outright bad has happened this month, just a bunch of tiny things that eventually build up and effect you. One of those months where you just smile and bite through it. I had been asking the Lord what he has for me in this season, what's next, what should I be doing? ...and I hadn't heard anything. I started letting little things get to me, then some financial-stresses, home-stresses, friendship-stresses, not-working-stresses. Satan was pushing my buttons and I was letting him.

Last night before I went to bed, I asked the Lord to give me energy to tackle some stuff when I woke up, since I greatly struggle with procrastination, which leads to doing nothing.
When I woke up, I did the dishes, grabbed some breakfast, and read my devotional before any Netflix or games of any sort.
My devotional was on deliverance but also spoke of being still, be thankful and how blessings come through joyous acceptance and anticipation.

Through reading today's chapter, I realized I've been very focused on the future, and all the things I haven't been able to tackle, even though I have the time. and even though it wasn't in writing, I felt God telling me that it is OK to not be busy with outside things at the moment. To stop, take a breath, and rest in him at this time, and it will all be taken care of.

I'm not very good at that-- but it gave me peace.

Even though I always know it, it's good to get a reminder every once in awhile that the Lord has my best interests in mind, and I need to trust in him before I can move forward.

I don't know what this next chapter of my life looks like. I don't know when I'm going to get a job, or if my friendships will work out, all I know is that right now: I need to stop, be still, appreciate where I am, and be thankful for now and for what's to come.

Just thought I'd share.